Submit To Our Smith Machine Overlords

We are being assimilated by machines. Resistance is futile. But it’s a Good Thing ™, because the machines we’re surrendering to are the smith machines in your local gym. Don’t be afraid. Smith machines will be good to us if we submit to their formfactor. Machines can help man achieve what man alone cannot.
I can […]

robot overlord

We are being assimilated by machines. Resistance is futile. But it’s a Good Thing ™, because the machines we’re surrendering to are the smith machines in your local gym. Don’t be afraid. Smith machines will be good to us if we submit to their formfactor. Machines can help man achieve what man alone cannot.

I can see you are frightened. You say that for centuries man has used free weights, and man has prospered. Nevertheless, that was the old way. Man’s pathetic attempts to deeply penetrate and stimulate muscle fibres of the chest using free weights have failed in the past, because weaker secondary muscles like shoulders and triceps would fail first. Our smith machine masters confine the body to a single plane of motion, thereby removing the need for supporting muscle groups to stabilize the weight. This, unbeliever, leads to maximum recruitment of the primary muscles fibres - the muscles you are trying to work in the first place.

I, for one, welcome our new smith machine overlords and their superior muscle isolating abilities. Submit to the future, and enjoy the brave new world of bodybuilding.

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